Screwed
by littleninjin
Summary: They fight. They  NWS . And there's a plot in there, somewhere. They just have to find it.  yaoi, 535
1. The AntiLovers

I do not own Saiyuki and made no money writing this.

* * *

He does the same thing, every morning. It makes no difference if it's a bed or sand. He sits up, lights a cigarette, then elbows the lump behind him. Hard. "Here." Sanzo will drop another cigarette on the lump, and wait for that lump to sit up and pop that thing in his mouth. The lump's name is Sha Gojyo. "Smoke up, get up and get going." Sanzo will always say. Then he will lean forward to grab some hair, a shirt, his face- whatever- and press his lit cigarette tip to that other unlit end.

This is their morning kiss.

One particular morning the ritual was performed in a narrow cot between sweaty sheets. The desert sun was already blazing through the bedside window. Sanzo slipped out, naked for only a moment.

"You get dressed faster than anyone I ever fucked."

"You are disgusting." Sanzo didn't bother to look up as he pulled the robes over his shoulders.

"You didn't complain about that, last night."

Sanzo took a long drag before crushing his cigarette out. "So you're good at one thing." He went to the door. "Barely."

Gojyo stared at the door long after Sanzo left.

"Of course I know. We both know." Hakkai packed the last of their food. "I think we need to get more cigarettes. You two have practically become chain smokers."

Gojyo paced the room. The room he was supposed to have shared with Hakkai that night. But lately he'd been playing switch with Goku. Telling the little monkey there was food to be had in Hakkai's bags, in an inn pantry, up some chipmunk's butt. It was enough to do the job. "Well... It just happened."

"Maybe you wouldn't smoke as much if you weren't trying to have a love affair with an angry monk?" Hakkai took it out of his mouth, took a drag for himself, then ground it out in the ashtray on the rickety nightstand. "I'm surprised you thought it was a secret. Goku thinks you're corrupting his precious Sanzo with- what did he call it? Oh, yes! - your 'pervert buttsex.'"

He coughed. "Pervert buttsex?"

"And alot more. Seems that our little boy is growing up." Hakkai checked some hidden compartment in the duffel. "Ah! So you two didn't find the extra carton. Apparently you don't smoke while you're busy."

"So, you two knew. Pretty weird, huh?"

Hakkai sighed. "Gojyo, why are we talking about this? Clearly you want to talk to Sanzo."

"Talk to goldilocks?" He snorted. "Are you serious?"

"Instead of asking me what I think, ask him what he thinks."

"I know what he thinks. He thinks..." He frowned.

"And they say there's no hope for you!"

"Oh, come on. You've got to admit, it's weird, right? I mean, the guy is supposed to hate all that stuff. But I swear to you, he is..."

"Gojyo," Hakkai crossed his arms, "Just talk to him."

"Talk to him. Like that's so easy."

"And getting him to have sex was easy?"

"Easier than you'd think."

Gojyo tried. And his efforts were not without temptation. The right kind, the kind he could offer in daylight. He offered the bastard a beer before they hit the road.

"No."

Offered him ganja as they stood together and pissed into a sand pit during a pit stop.

"No."

But then he realized the guy was too smart for that. Gojyo had to get tough. So he cornered him in the next town, down a back alley, where Sanzo ducked to avoid some dribbling priest.

"What the fuck do you keep bothering me for?"

Gojyo kicked a pop can. It flew up and into the air. And fell between them.

Sanzo snorted. "Are you trying to tell me you want to join some kick-the-can league?"

Gojyo leaned against the brick wall. He opened his mouth. Closed it. Then he smiled. "You're a funny guy, you know that?"

"Yeah. The life of the party. Hilarious."

"Listen, um... You and me, at night. What do you think about it?"

Sanzo kicks the can. It flies up in the air. It lands in exactly the same spot. "I don't. Is that all you wanted to ask me?"

Gojyo lit a cigarette. He smiled and shrugged. He turned and strolled back into that dusty village main street filled with nameless people. "Bullshit," he muttered under his breath.

How did this come to be? How did he and he become these two anti-lovers? Raw and hungry by night, and so cool by day. The story is like any other story about opposing wills. Opposition is complimentary, as it will be seen.

It started at a bar in a town whose name is unimportant. There they sat, the only two patrons left. Even the barmaster was gone, paid off with an ungodly sum from a godly credit card, too tired to question good fortune and too poor to say no.

The soon-to-bes were at war. A drinking war. It was an ongoing war to see who could hold their liquor best. That night the battlefield was littered with casualties: bottles and cans and shot glasses, all left for dead.

Sanzo threw back a gulp of something distilled from the depths of hell. And sneered as he swallowed it down. "Now you."

Gojyo grabbed the bottle and did the same. Licked his lips when he was done. Then took another swallow. Twice as long. "Mother's milk."

"More like your Daddy's."

"You would know, baldie." Gojyo slid the bottle across the table. Cans fell to the floor in it's wake.

"And only you would go there." Sanzo looked right at him as he drank. Deeply, as if he were a man dying of thirst. "Now you."

He handed it back. In a drunken fumble the bottle wobbled. Each overcompensated with a lunge forward, just enough for their fingers to touch. They both pulled back, but too much. The bottle slipped again and it crashed to the floor.

"Whoa." Gojyo lit a cigarette. "Guess you didn't wanna see me drink you under the table after all."

"Your fault. Get another."

"That was it." Gojyo kicked the broken bits. "Whole bar's tapped out."

Sanzo cursed with the fluency only a monk could muster. After all, what is a curse? It's just an obscene prayer. "May as well go to sleep. Or go find a whore, in your case." He rolled his eyes. "You and your whores."

Gojyo was about to get up. But that last thing Sanzo said stopped him. "Jealous?"

Sanzo grabbed his empty cigarette pack, crushed it and threw it across the room. "Of what? You'd fuck a granny given half a chance."

"A hot granny, sure."

"Oh, just shut up." Sanzo slammed his hands on the table as he got up. It shook. He shook. And he stumbled, ever so slightly away. "We leave at sunrise."

Gojyo watched as he walked away. Watched the sway of Sanzo's robe. The sway of Sanzo's walk. The sway is Sanzo. He did sway.

And when Gojyo got up, he was swaying, too.

The next night, in another no-name town, after another underwhelming scuttle with some nondescript demon, the local innkeeper let them stay for free. Let them eat for free. Goku gorged. Hakkai stored supplies. And those two resumed their battle.

They made sure their stock was reinforced.

"This time you won't make it." Gojyo winked at him. Blew a kiss, then laughed at Sanzo's sneer. "Maybe I'll have time for one of those whores your obsessed with counting."

Sanzo sucked down an entire beer can. "You wish."

Gojyo pulled the tab off another, nodded at Sanzo's respectable burp, and matched him gulp fpr gulp. His burp was louder. "You know what I did last night?"

"About two strokes?" Sanzo took the cigarette out of Gojyo's hand.

"You really spend to much time imagining what I do, goldilocks. No. I went to bed alone."

Sanzo put his next can down. One eyebrow went up and he took a long drag of that cigarette. "Now there's a first."

"Don't look so surprised. I don't always get laid."

"More drinking. Less talking." And he led by example. "Now you."

"Hey, I'm talking man to man, here. Or, well, man to monk. I don't mind the rep, believe me. But come on. All the time? A guy's gotta have a night off every once in a while."

"I said drink."

Sanzo watched Gojyo. Gojyo watched as he watched. Watched as he gulped the frothy stuff down. Watched him watching him as he wiped the foam from his mouth. "So," he looked around the empty bar. "Alone again, huh?"

"I'm getting the whiskey." Sanzo got up and went behind the bar. "That damned beer is putting you on some confessional tangent."

"Suit yourself."

"And quiet yourself." He came back with a very large, very dusty bottle. "I am not here to listen to you pour your heart out."

"Some monk."

"Some pervert." Sanzo twisted the cap and drank. "Now you."

Gojyo drank. "You."

Then Sanzo.

Then Gojyo.

And Sanzo and Gojyo.

They drank silently, watching each other in an uneasy duel, waiting for the other to break that silence. Neither did. They continued drinking, and the words distilled in their minds as each became a blurry buzzing image to the other.

Eventually they found a bottle, a green bottle, the likes of which they'd never tasted. They each made a face when they tried it. And another when they had finished. Whatever it was, it was more than just liquor.

It made them tired. It made them forget their battle. Cigarettes burned, forgotten at their fingertips. They just stared at each other, feeling their feet root into the dirt floor and their heads expand like balloons.

Somehow they slid their way across the floor, staggering through the never-ending hallway, catching each other, sometimes successfully, sometimes not, once tumbling together. They rolled toward some room. An empty room. It did not mater if it was theirs or not. They were desperate for the first time in their lives, because the alcohol had won.

They fell in the cot, groaning as the world spun.

Sanzo woke up with a pounding head and a bladder aching for relief. "Shit." He'd slept in his robes. He hated sleeping in them, they always made him sweat. But not this much. No. Then he woke up he felt it. An arm. Around his waist. A leg, thrown over his hip. A hard on, a huge, throbbing hard on, was pressing up against him. "What the fuck?"

He shot out of bed, gun in hand, ready to fire.

"Whoa, princess..." Gojyo poked his head out from under the sheet. "Chill the fuck out!"

Sanzo cocked the gun.

Gojyo stumbled out, hands over his head, shirtless, groggy and hung over. "Hey, it's just me. Chill."

Sanzo motioned toward the door. "Get out."

"Lemme get my shirt?"

"I said get the fuck out before I blow your dick off!"

And he did. Sans shirt.

Gojyo smoked two packs on the road. One cigarette after another. He didn't have a word to say when Goku started in on him. Not even when the kid called him a pervert. Or a manwhore. He kept watching Sanzo's reflection in the side door mirror. The guy looked pissed. Seriously pissed.

Sanzo smoked even more. It was a nonstop chain of cigarettes, the next lit by the last. Butts littered the desert sand. The world was his ashtray and he did not want. He kept glaring back at Gojyo, hating his stare. Hating his face. Wanting to kick it in. To punch it out. To make him stop staring at him.

Staring through him.

"My, you two are quiet." Hakkai smiled his usual smile.

"Too quiet." Goku waved a hand in front of Gojyo's face. "What's the matter, didn't get laid last night?"

"Shut up!" Both Gojyo and Sanzo hollered. It was the only thing they said on the long day's journey to nowhere.

The evening was no better. There was no nameless town. There were no countless bottles, no war to wage. Nothing but canned food, a handful of smokes, and the Jeep to sleep in. They watched the sun set in front of them. Only Goku and Hakkai seemed to follow suit and go to sleep.

Sanzo let down his seat. It squashed Gojyo's legs. "Hey, precious! Pull up a little."

He didn't. "Go to sleep."

"How? My legs are going numb."

"Bullshit. Close your eyes and shut up."

Gojyo shook the headrest. "Lemme out, then."

"Nothing's stopping you."

"You are! Sit up so I can get out. Then you can lay back and pretend not to jerk off."

Sanzo sat up, without pulling the seat back, and glared. Moonlight made him look more like a murderer than a monk. "You sound like you got a problem, you fucking pervert. What're you gonna do about it?"

Gojyo's adrenalin shot through every vein in his body. "Lemme out and I'll show you."

The seat went up. Those two jumped over the doors. The wind blew sand all around them as they stood there, hands fisted, ready for action.

Gojyo threw a punch, Sanzo blocked, then came back with an undercut fit to bring a man to his knees. But a half demon? Not a chance. Gojyo came back for him, over and over until he finally landed one right into Sanzo's mouth. But he threw so hard they both fell back into a dune and tumbled down, down down into a pit.

Gojyo was on top of him, straddling him, forcing his hands above his head. "Give up."

Sanzo spat blood in his face.

Gojyo licked off what landed on his mouth. "I said: Give. Up."

"No!" Sanzo kicked, and Gojyo gasped as he fell forward.

Their mouths collided. The world shifted as they continued the fight with tongues and teeth. Blood mingled. Hands tore, scrambled and punched. Legs tangled and kicked as they rolled back and forth.

Then they shoved each other away instantly. Simultaneously. One stared at the other, panting. Neither said a word. Then they came at each other, snarling like a couple of wild animals in heat.

"That was some night." Hakkai adjusted his rear view mirror.

Goku bit into his bean bun. "Yeah. I slept like a baby."

"You are a baby," Gojyo grumbled.

"Take it back."

Gojyo shrugged. "Wake me up when we get... wherever we're going."

Hakkai's eyebrow went up. And Sanzo? He was already asleep, with the seat raised up. "Some night." Hakkai began to hum a little tune. Goku kept eating. And those two did sleep, all day long.

But they were awake all night.

They had settled into a strange routine. At night, in the dark, when they were sure no one was aware, they would tangle themselves up into each other. Collide, snarl, and fight to dominate each other. Sometimes Sanzo would win. Once he had drawn his gun and made him suck on the end while he pounded away at Gojyo. Another time, Gojyo pinned him against a wall and took him right there, dry and hard. So hard the monk would walk with a slight limp the next day. Whatever the situation, it was always rough. Always brutal. Always covert.

And always, they thought, dirty little secret.

But it wasn't, thought Gojyo. The real secret was the fact that it wasn't. And there were opinions about it. And it bothered Gojyo, because he didn't know the opinion that mattered the most to him.

Shit.

As Hakkai drove out of yet another no name town, humming that strange little tune, Gojyo could feel Goku watching him. Could feel the kid's imagination whirl, or was he recalling something he saw? Something he wasn't meant to see?

"What are you looking at?"

"A big pervert."


	2. With Friends Like These

I do not own Saiyuki and made no money writing this.

Note: I have a doctor's note excusing the slow update. XD

"Hello, father."

Sanzo pulled a cigarette out of the softpack with his lips. "Keep saying that, Hakkai, and I will demand a paternity test."

"Should we split up and watch them?" They stood in front of yet another nondescript motel, in yet another nondescript town. Gojyo carried their duffel bags inside. Goku was already stuffing his face in a predictably adjoining restaurant.

"Probably." Sanzo rubbed his neck. Began to say something. Then stopped. Then turned away.

"If it means anything, I am glad." A little boy ran between them. "Perhaps I should clarify."

Sanzo took the cigarette out of his mouth, though he did not turn around. Goku was waving at him through the window: Mouth full and food everywhere. He did not wave back. He was not paying attention. To him. "No. Be more vague for a change."

"I'm glad you two are lovers."

Sanzo grinned. It was a sight so rare Goku choked at the sight of it. "Jealous?"

"Of him or you?"

Sanzo parted the blue glass beads hanging over the restaurant entry. "Fucking obtuse psycho..."

He was excited about the spread. Even more than usual. He was smiling and clapping and saying his thank yous with a full mouth. And so happy when Sanzo came to sit next to him. So happy.

Somehow, something seemed...

Sanzo sat back and watched the kid. The kid... he really wasn't a kid. He just wanted to be one. Tried so hard to be one. Too hard. Damnit. Sanzo exhaled a huge plume of smoke and shook his head.

"You're not all that convincing." Goku stopped, put down his drumstick and blinked. "No point denying. I can hear you." He pointed to his temple. "I hear everything." He held his hand up when Goku tried to say no. "Everything." He ground the cigarette out. He lit another.

"Oh." Goku's face flushed. "Are you.. are you mad?" Sanzo glared. Goku put his fork down. "I... It's not my fault. I just can't stop..."

"Don't waste your time trying to assign fault, you idiot, and start finding something else to do with your time."

"But I'm lonely! You don't keep me company anymore. What else am I supposed to do? Hang out with four eyes?"

"Get him to take you for a walk. Get those sticky buns you like so much."

"But it's not the same, anymore." Goku's whining was giving him a headache. A big headache. Damn brat had that technique down, but there was no way Sanzo was about to let him get his way. Not this time.

"Don't start with that sentimental garbage. We both know it's bullshit."

"I miss you, Sanzo."

He puffed and brooded. Brooded and puffed. But those big, sad eyes weren't going anywhere

Neither was that voice in his head.

"Don't do it, again!" He could barely manage to get the words out. "I have to go." He would have run out of the damned place if he could've.

Damnit.

It was a cool night. The breeze was sweet. A nightingale sang. Two lovers walked hand in hand, pausing at a bridge to kiss under the moonlight. Then they ran away, screaming in terror at the sight of two half naked lunatics assaulting each other in the muddy water, below.

"Com'ere, bitch!" Gojyo yanked his hair, hard. Hard enough to force Sanzo to his knees. "Open up." He slapped his cock against his face. "You know you wanna." Slap, slap, slap, slap!

Then Sanzo pulled his legs out from under him. Gojyo crashed backward into the water. Punched blindly, kicked hard, and bit, even as what was left of his clothes were torn off his body.

Sanzo reared back. He touched the bloody wound on his shoulder. He glared down at the grinning bastard at his feet. "Shameless whore."

Gojyo arched his back and ground his ass against him. "Make me sorry then, princess. I've been such a bad, bad boy."

He knew it was the wrong thing to do. But he couldn't help it. No, even though Sanzo was extra mean and really meant it when he told him to stop, Goku couldn't stop. And he really tried, too. Told himself he'd really just go to bed after Gojyo brought him the pork roast and fried rice. For a few minutes he almost believed he would. It was easy to believe when he was eating. But eating only filled up one hunger, not the other.

Sexy stuff wasn't all that interesting to him. Not the kind of stuff he'd seen before. And he'd seen a few things. Followed that pervert when he used to go some lady's place. They'd get naked and kiss and cuddle and whatever. That was boring. Like listening to Hakkai talk about bookstuff. Nothing to make Goku interested in grown up crap.

But when he saw those two-

Whoa. That was different.

But he didn't mean to see anything. No way. He wasn't spying on them the first time. Hell, if he knew what they were about to do he would've left before they got started. Nah. The first time was all an accident...

It had happened on a quiet night in a little village, just a few days back. Gojyo'd gotten him a big ole pile of meat buns. Then he told Goku the usual: sleep in Hakkai's room. Goku didn't say anything. He just stuffed all his questions down his gut. Questions like-

Why did Gojyo do this?

Where was Sanzo?

...and, the hardest one... Why didn't Sanzo want to take care of him, anymore?

He finished up, fast. Gojyo never stuck around to see if he wanted more, so Goku'd go out to fend for himself. It wasn't a big deal. Inn pantries were easy pickins. But something got into the kid one night. Call it another question. It went something like-

What's Sanzo doing, now?

And it wasn't hard to find out. He just stretched his feelings out like a net and followed the spot where they caught. It was in an were in an alley. At first he thought they were sparring. But something was off about it. They were grabbing at each other's privates a little too much for a brawl. And they were... kissing. Sanzo, his Sanzo, was kissing that pervert. And it wasn't boring. No. It was raw. Nasty.

And awesome.

He never knew about sucking or taking it up... up there. Or that a guy would even like it. More than like it. Sanzo like it so much he pulled his gun on Gojyo. Said he'd kill him if he came too soon. Goku body tingled all over. He dropped the roll in his hand. Dropped and fell to his knees

in shock

amazement

horror

He staggered away when they were done, so hard and so unsure. And he forgot that roll on the cobblestones, along with a little piece of his innocence.

Night after night he watched them. How stupid was the kappa for thinking a bag of eats would be a distraction? Goku began telling himself he deserved to be duped. And damn, if he couldn't wait to see what that pervert was gonna do the next night.

Damn if he couldn't wait, tonight, either. Even though he was found out. Fuck, Sanzo knew. How did he know? Goku was so careful. Super careful. He would hide in garbage cans and and hang from ceiling beams. He was great at hiding and creeping around. He had to be, otherwise he'd starve on those scraps those stingy guys threw at him. It was just like the time Sanzo freed him. Somehow Sanzo could hear Goku's brain. Oh, man. He had to get a grip. Sanzo would know if he did it, again. Man... the look in his eyes when he told him to cut it out. Like Goku was the real pervert.

Maybe he was.

And for that one happy moment he wouldn't have cared because he was sitting on that bridge where that sweet couple had been. And he was doing alot more than just watching, as Sanzo and Gojyo went at it.

"When are we gonna talk?"

"Talk all you want." Sanzo collapsed into the bed. "I'm going to sleep."

"No, c'mon." Gojyo lit and offered a joint. "Dude..."

"I'm not one of your whores. Quit treating me like one."

Gojyo left it on the beer can and sat on the matress next to him. "Aw, honey. Don't say that. You're practically one of the girls!"

"Shut up." He slapped his hand away before Gojyo could play with his hair. "On second thought don't talk. Stupid is loud."

"You do realize we're talking."

"Do I have to strangle you?"

"Maybe. But something tells me you've got something to say. Something you wanted to say to me the other morning."

"If you're going to give me some declaration of love I swear I will puke all over you, kappa."

"And if you tell me you don't think about what we just did I'll call you a liar." Gojyo smiled when Sanzo sat up, frowning and looking sexy as fuck with that bedhead.

"Liar?"

"You heard me, blondie: liar."

"Not loud enough." Sanzo slapped his face . Gojyo smacked back. Then lowered his head and devoured that lying mouth of his.

"Loud enough for you, princess?"

What did I tell you?"

"Huh?"

"You heard me!" Sanzo banged against the restroom door. Banged so hard he busted a slat. "What did I tell you not to do!"

"Shit!" The rest of Goku's piss splattered all over his shoes. "Can't you wait til I'm done in here?"

The door popped open and Sanzo's fan found it's favorite spot: Goku's head.

"I'm sorry!" He really was. "I didn't mean to!" No, that wasn't true. "But it's not my fault!"

"Oh, really?"

"Owwww! I can't stop, okay? I tried but it doesn't work! I wanna watch. I know it's perverted. Owwww! And I hate it, okay?"

"You're still full of shit! I can hear what you're thinking, idiot!"

They should have thanked Hakkai for stepping in. For pulling them out of there. For pulling Goku's shorts back on, to boot. But one didn't have the sense to say it and the other didn't have the disposition.

"My, my." He sat them both on his mattress and surveyed them over a chipped saucer. "Jeep, what do you make of this?" He nodded at the friendly chirp. "I agree. They are both pretty pathetic."

"One chirp means all that..." Sanzo snorted.

"Ah. Maybe I am reading a bit too much in a chirp."

Goku crossed his arms and looked away. So did Sanzo.

"But I don't see any evidence to the contrary. And though you know many things, you don't know if Dragon is a very complex and subtle language."

"What the fuck is going on in here?" Gojyo stopped when he saw the broken door on the floor. Stopped when he saw Sanzo and Goku sitting together, refusing to look at each other.

"Oh, just your typical family morning."

Gojyo rolled his eyes. "Dad beating up on little brother?"

Hakkai shrugged. "What should I do?"

Gojyo walked around the door, eyed one very pissy princess and licked his lips. Slowly. "Sounds like pops needs a good spanking!"

"One shot, right between the eyes." Sanzo lit a cigarette. "The bullet's worth more than the trouble."

Gojyo made a face. Then he nudged Goku's shoulder. "Lighten up, kid. It's not so bad."

It really wasn't.

The sun was shining. The birds were singing while the desert took a vacation and the savannah covered its shift. Grass, tall as a child swayed like an ocean. Jeep plowed throw it, happily. It was so much cooler than all that sand and rock.

Gojyo nudged Goku, this time in the back seat. "Come on, kid. You haven't called me a pervert all day."

Goku finally gave in and smiled. Just a little. "Whatever, you pervert."

"Aw. That's my monkey!" Gojyo caught Sanzo watching through the passenger side mirror. He almost pretended not to notice. But fuck it. He winked, instead.


	3. Keeping Secrets

Hakkai liked order. Not because he was a naturally orderly person. No, it was a form of control. Hakkai was not a naturally controlling person, though. Contol was simply a sort of self assurance. Hakkai naturally needed that.

The tins had to be stacked in a specific order: meats, then vegetables, and beans. They were substacked according to expiration: oldest to newest. Water was stored the same way, going from right to left. Cigarettes? Both full flavored soft pack and hardpack light cartons were stocked. Backup packs hidden, just in case one of those guys decided to go on another chainsmoking jag. Clothes were always washed, folded and kept separated. This was done meticulously. Not because he was some neat freak. Not because he enjoyed shaking his head at the others when they grabbed the wrong can or got more bloodstains than they should have on their clothes. It wasn't that, though it was interesting to note their practically meek responses. (Yes, even Sanzo, in his own way. Sure, he'd mutter "bite me," or some other serenely spiritual chain of blessings, but he would comply like the rest.) It was as if they understood all this order was essential for the next day. The next day they wanted to see. It gave them all hope.

"So, tell me what you want to do, after all this is over."

"I already told you." Hakkai shifted behind him, just a tad. "Keep your head down and pull up your hair."

"I did." Gojyo let it down, again, and gathered it all up, again. "Happy?"

"Ecstatic." Hakkai dipped the cloth into the water. Rubbed it with a soap bar. Rubbed it over Gojyo's back. Carefully, making sure to swab open cuts and wounds. "You really should take care during your encounters." Bubbles slowly slid down his skin. "I can hardly tell which wounds are from the enemy or him." He lingered over a bite mark on the left shoulder.

Gojyo closed his eyes. The soap stung but the attention was relaxing. So was the water. Fuck- water! He nearly came when they passed over the bridge and caught sight of the sweet little spring. This slice of heaven called to him and he knew he'd raise hell if they didn't stop. Good thing they all felt like a dip. But not like he did.

If Gojyo had his way, he'd stay for the rest of the day. Or his life.

"Done."

He let himself slide into the stream. It moved through the valley like blood pulsed through his body. He let himself stay down there. Let himself be. Just him and the muffled life blood of the earth.

Damn, it felt good. Like home. Too bad he couldn't stay.

Hakkai held out the washcloth. "Your turn."

And so Gojyo reciprocated. "You still didn't tell me my favorite story."

"Ah."

Gojyo was rougher than Hakkai. But the guy liked it like that. His neck was always too tight, shoulders a little too bunched, back always knotted up. Gojyo soaped with the cloth, but kneaded with his hands. "So, go on."

Hakkai began to tell him, between silent pauses where any other man would've groaned. "I would like to find a nice little town. Not in the desert. Maybe near the ocean. And I would like to have a home, a home with a wife and children."

"The strong woman."

"And beautiful. Don't forget!"

"Ah, how could I? She's got to be, because old Gojyo is depending on some hot daughters out of you."

"And I want to teach children at an orphanage. Teach them maths and languages."

Gojyo worked an old knot in the lower vertebrate. The worst one. Bubbles foamed beneath his fingers. "What else?"

"And I want old man Gojyo to live far, far away from my beautiful daughters!"

They laughed. "Not a chance."

Hakkai immersed himself for a moment. Just long enough to rinse.

"This strong woman, she's lucky."

"Luck would be a plus."

"No," Gojyo smiled back. "She's lucky to have you in her future." He looked away. Wondered where the others were- probably on the other side of the bridge, maybe even talking about their own futures? "Did you ever wonder, Hakkai? Wonder why you and me are still friends?"

Hakkai put his hand on his shoulder. He looked him in the eye. "Because we feel like it." Water rushed between their bodies. Wind blew through the trees. Birdsong was everywhere. "Aren't you going to ask me why I am not your lover, instead?"

Gojyo shook his head. "No. Not that you wouldn't be blown away or that you wouldn't be half bad, yourself."

"Oh, well thank you for that."

"It's just... " He shrugged. "I don't know why."

"I do." Hakkai's expression suddenly became very serious. "How am I going to explain to my wife that my lover wants our daughters?"

Gojyo laughed so hard he fell back into the water.

Sanzo looked like a drowned cat: dripping from head to sandal. Even his cigarette was wet. Hakkai took a long look and began to hum his funny little tune. Hopped into Jeep, started him up with a tickle of the key and patted the passenger seat.

"Played to hard in the water, Father?"

"Not a word from any of you." Sanzo slammed the door shut. "Not a word." He pointed at Hakkai's smiling face. "That grin counts."

Gojyo pulled Goku away, before monkey-butt could hop on in, and whispered; "What happened?"

Goku shrugged. "He's shy."

"I said not a word!" Sanzo turned and cocked his gun. "Are you two jackasses going to gossip like a couple of old women or get in the car? I would just as soon you didn't!"

Shy.

Gojyo wanted to ask what that meant. Was going to ask what that meant. Even planned to corner the kid at the next piss stop and find out.

Shy.

Genjyo imma-gonna-keel-joo Sanzo, shy about taking his jillionth bath with the monkey. Genjo fuck-like-you-fight Sanzo didn't want to be naked in front of the same idiot he'd been naked around little hard-on-for-food?

Something wasn't adding up.

They'd all seen each other naked. It was no big deal. They all knew Goku had some weird mole right on his tailbone. Hakkai's scar looked like a freaky smile on his gut. Sanzo was a grower, not a shower. (Gojyo could attest he grew, though!) And Gojyo didn't even think twice about the stupid daisy some dumb slut tattoed on his ass.

What was there to hide?

But he didn't get a chance. Not to piss or to ask, because- wouldn't you know it?- they were due a workout. Yeah, some motley bunch of demons literally burst out if the sand and jumped them. Or tried to. (How long had those poor fuckers been baking in those sandholes, waiting for them?) And of course they had their asses handed to them. Literally, one case Gojyo handled.

And of course it meant there was a town nearby. And there was no time for a pit stop. Hakkai hot-rodded Jeep toward the joint, appolagizing for every bump along the way. Every bump that reminded every one of them that they had to take a leak. Bad.

"I'm gonna explode if you don't stop, Hakkai! I swear!" Gojyo meant it, too. He really did.

"You were supposed to wash up at that river, not drink it." Goku didn't look too comfortable, himself. "Damn, you freak!" He nearly fell out of Jeep when Gojyo stood up, as they were rolling down a dune, and pulled down his pants. "Put that thing back in!"

"Hey! Not all of us are shy!"

And so the desert got a little rain.

Gojyo rummaged through the bag.

"It's not there."

"Then where?" He cursed. "Fuck! Hakkai! You know I hate religious towns! The monks always keep the booze for themselves."

"And it wouldn't help that Sanzo is at their temple, or that that we couldn't come."

"Or that he didn't even care? Nope. Score!" He held up the metal tin. Shook it. Snickered. And shook his finger. "Don't ever say you're not a smoker."

"Hakkai doesn't smoke." Goku was busy working his way through a pile of pork buns. But he always had time to talk with his mouth full. He was skilled, that way.

"Not tobacco."

Gojyo snorted. "But plenty of pot." He took a bud out of the tin. "Ah." He sniffed it like a true connessueir. Then he broke the bits apart on the lid. "Where's the pipe?"

"Gone."

"What do you mean, gone?"

"I mean gone, as in broken when you went digging for resign."

Gojyo was not impressed. "I fixed it."

"Then I threw it away and bought more rolling paper."

"Oh, thanks, alot."

"You're welcome!"

"That stuff stinks!" Goku was not pleased. "Put it away!"

"I told you, he wouldn't be able to tolerate us smoking it around him." Hakkai threw the rolling papers on the matress. "Make due, will you dear?"

"With pleasure, my love." Gojyo blew him a kiss and commenced to rolling. By the time he licked the joint and lit up, Goku was gagging.

"I told you."

Gojyo held the smoke in. Just enough to make the world fuzzy. "I say he should have some."

Hakkai took a long, hard look at Goku, who'd hiked his shirt up over his nose.

"It'll make the food taste really good..." Gojyo grinned. Nodded. Winked.

"Don't do your pervert thing on me."

Hakkai coughed, hard. But he handed it over to the kid.

"Go ahead." Gojyo winked. "It won't bite'cha."

Hakkai leaned over and whispered as Goku took the longest, deepest drag in the history of novitiate joint-dragging. "What are you up to?"

"You'll see."

Those idiots.

Didn't they realize he knew what they were doing? He knew, before this spoiled, bald fool invited him to this sweltering clay temple, thanking him for saving their town - as if that was what Sanzo just lived for!- he knew they would be up to no good.

Ganja. He could feel his thoughts getting caught and bogged down with every puff that stupid monkey took. Moron! He shook his head. He nearly smiled when the old fool caught his eye. "Everything alright, your Sereneness?"

Did he call him princess? "I need a smoke." He nearly laughed when the priest stumbled over words and steps to show him the way.

"So... you and Sanzo?" Goku was laying on his back. "You and Sanzo..." Goku was holding a pork bun over his head. "You. Sanzo. I know all about you and Sanzo..." Goku was stoned, immaculate.

"Me and Sanzo..."

Hakkai interrupted. The snore was very polite. And very well timed.

"I know what you're doing..." He didn't say it. He sang it.

"I know you know..." Gojyo sang it back.

"And I know something you don't know..." What a weird song.

"I know you know and I know I don't know..." But he was keeping up. Sort of. Scratched up, funked up wooden slats couldn't keep him stuck, but they tried. He slid closer, leaned closer and put on his friendliest face. "You're gonna tell me."

Goku dropped the bun on his chest. He exhaled as if it was a pin and he was the balloon it popped. "When did you first, you know, think about sex?"

"Can't say." Gojyo lit a cigarette. Blew smoke rings. Watched the kid count them. "Do you think about me and him?"

Goku just nodded.

"I won't take him away from you. You know that, right?"

The bun fell off his chest. He must've... been holding his breath?

"Did you... try to do anything with him in the river?"

Goku closed his eyes.

"You can't pretend nothing happened."

"I'm a pervert, too." His eyes were shut, tight. "I... I'm going to fuck everything up being like this!"

"Hey! Kid, hey!" He shook his shoulder. "You didn't fuck anything up. Okay?"

"The room's spinning."

Shit. "Come on. you just need to lay down." He got up. Held out his hand. Smiled at the sad little monkey face. "Come on."

Gojyo had no way of knowing what it meant to Goku. Taking his hand. Helping him as he stumbled into the cot. No way of knowing how the lightbulb behind his head made him look like he had a halo. Had no way of knowing. Because he was not Goku.

But someone else did.

He was sitting in a garden, grinding out the tenth of twenty cigarettes in his pack, hiding himself.

Hakkai was a hopeful man. It did no good to lose hope, and it didn't hurt to have any. But this was not to say he believed in false hope. Or blind luck. As he told Gojyo once, luck is made. Carefully. With planning. With cunning. With determination. And , most importantly, he made it look effortless.

Hakkai was not asleep. No. He was waiting. And when those two were the actual sleepers, snoring with and farting in that little cot, he left the room.

Left the inn.

Left the village.

Found the desert.

And the sky.

He threw Jeep up into the blue. Stretched his hand as he soared. Smiled when he felt the presence he had sought. "Hello." He did not turn around.

"Did you really let him smoke all that ganja?"

"What harm would it do?" He finally turned around. Looked at him. But Sanzo was staring in the direction of the village. "You are worried."

He would no answer. Not with words. He just spat.

"Can I offer advice?"

"Can I stop you?"

"Someone once told me to do whatever the fuck I wanted."

"Calling me a hypocrite, now?"

"Yes." He smiled. He laughed. He even pointed his finger like a gun- the nerve!- at Sanzo. "You aren't completely immune to criticism, are you?"

"Are you immune to a bullet?"

That stopped the damn laughing. But it didn't kill the smile. "Why does it bother you? Letting those two be together? It's not jealousy. I can tell."

Sanzo's eyebrow went up.

"It's fear." He stepped forward, and some how the crumbing rocks didn't make him stumble or even falter. "You're afraid one of them will tell the other something." Sanzo stood his ground. Lit a smoke and blew it in Hakkai's face. But it still didn't stop the guy. "Gojyo wanted to know what happened at the river this morning. Goku didn't tell him a thing. But he was upset, he said that much."

"What did he say?" His voice was too rough. To rushed.

"I won't pry." Hakkai stepped back and held his hands up. "No demand to know what is going on."

"But an exchange would suit you?"

"You know me so well."

"No way."

Hakkai shrugged. "Then what are you here for?"

Sanzo turned away. Took a long drag. Stared at the lone cloud to the east. "It must be hovering over that place." He shook his head. "The stupid monkey wanted to see my scars when I began to take off my robes. The ones that pervert left on me." He paused. "I'm sure you noticed his."

"Go on."

"I just put them back on. He got behind me. Pushed me in the water. And I smacked the daylights out of him. End of story."

"I see."

"Your turn."

"That makes sense, because Goku was calling himself a pervert." Hakkai put his hand on Sanzo's shoulder. "He's just curious, Sanzo."

He glared at the hand. Then him.

"Why is he so upset?"

Sanzo ground the cigarette out. "Jealousy? Envy?"

"Goku?" Hakkai didn't believe it. "You can do better than that."

Sanzo began to walk away. "Sounds like you got it all figured out, four eyes."

"That's three, not four," he whispered to himself.

Hakkai stood there, watching until Sanzo became a small dot on a red horizon. He held out his arm. Jeep came swooping down, crying as the claws clamped on a might too hard. But Hakkai didn't mind a little blood. "Did you hear that? He's got a secret."

Jeep agreed.

It was night when he came to his room. It was past midnight when he shook him awake. Between dusk and that point he had sat, watching those two sleep. "Wake up." Sanzo shook harder, then slapped his face. "Come on, you cheap piece of ass."

Gojyo combed the hair out of his face. Smiled. "What took you so long, princess?"

"None of your business. Get up and quit being pointless."

With pleasure.


End file.
